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Spousal rights are an important topic in Islam. In Islam, marriage is not simply a financial and physical arrangement, but the union of two people who wish to live a happy and fulfilling life together.
Certain rights are being given to both husband and wife with one another. In the light of the Quran and Sunnah today we will discuss what rights and duties the spouses have towards one another. Relationships between husbands and wives aren't like those between neighbors or friends; it is much more than that. The Quran says:
“And of His signs is that He has created for you, from yourselves, spouses that you may gain peace through them and He has set among you love and compassion. Surely in this there are signs for thoughtful people.”
(Surah Rum 30:21)
There are three financial rights that the wife has over her husband: the mahr (dowry), the spending, and the accommodations. Additionally, she has non-financial rights such as the right to be treated with kindness and love by her husband.
In Islam, the wife has a right to a certain amount of money from her husband when signing the marriage contract. The husband is required to pay this right to his wife which is to be decided before the marriage. Allah (SWT) says in the Quran:
And give to the women (whom you marry) their Mahr with a good heart
(Surah-al-Nisa 4:4)
Mahr shows the seriousness of the marriage contract and serves as a symbol of respect and honor for the woman.
According to Islamic scholars, husbands must spend on their wives, provided that the wives obey their husband's requests and do the right thing. On the other hand, she will not be entitled to this money if she refuses his commands.
Due to the marriage contract, a woman is only available to her husband, and cannot leave the home without his permission, therefore, it is obligatory to spend on her and provide her private accommodation (private room or house portion). Even if she is wealthy, she has the right to these things because Allah (SWT) says:
“but the father of the child shall bear the cost of the mother’s food and clothing on a reasonable basis.”
(Surah-al-Baqarah 2:233)
Muslims must treat their wives as equal individuals, with respect and kindness, and not be unfair or unkind to them. Having married more than one woman, he must ensure that each of them is treated equally and there is no injustice among them. All of them should be given equal time and money to spend. As mentioned Holy Quran:
“But if you (men) are afraid of not treating them equally (your wives), then marry only one,.”
(Surah-al-Nisa 4:3)
In Islam, It is generally accepted that husbands have more rights over their wives. It is the wife's responsibility to obey her husband and provide for his needs at all times:
A wife must be obedient to and respectful of her husband and obey his requests. In the same way that husbands protect and provide for their families, wives must also respect and maintain good relationships with their husbands. It is also important for them to be patient and understanding. As the Quran says:
“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means.”
(Surah-al-Nisa 4:34)
Few exceptions apply to this command, however. Wives are not required to obey their husbands when they ask them to do sinful or forbidden acts. Obeying is only necessary in the best interest of the person.
The husband should not overburden his wife with tasks she cannot handle on her own. For example the the wife may choose to help with household chores, like cooking, and cleaning but it is not obligatory for her
The wife is not allowed to refuse her husband sexual fulfillment once they are married in Islam. The wife must make herself available to her husband from the start of their marriage whenever he requests it, except when she is not feeling well, fasting, or on her period (Menstruation).
If a wife refuses her husband's request for physical intimacy, Allah (SWT) strongly condemns her, as indicated by this hadith from Muhammad (PBUH):
“When a man calls his wife to his bed and she refuses, and he went to sleep angry with her, the angels will curse her until morning.”
(Shahih-Bukhari, 3065; Muslim, 1436)
An important right a husband has over his wife is that she does not allow an individual to enter the house that he does not like or approve of. The Holy Prophet (PBUH) addressed the rights of both men and women in his very last sermon and instructed the wives not to admit anyone into their homes who was not approved by the husband.
“You have rights over your women and your women have rights over you. Your rights over your women are that they should not let anyone whom you dislike sit on your bed and they should not let anyone whom you dislike enter your house. Their rights over you are that you should feed and clothe them well.”
(Tirmidhi, 1163)
In the same way that husbands and wives have rights over each other, there are also times when they have equal responsibilities. Like in the following scenarios:
There can be no relationship or understanding between a husband and wife if there is no mutual kindness and respect, and this eventually results in the ending of the marriage. Both should aim for a healthy and happy family environment by practicing compassion, forgiveness, and gentleness at all times.
The Prophet (PBUH) said:
“The most complete persons in faith are those who have the best manners and the good among you are those who are good with their wives.”
(Bihar al-Anwar, vol. 71, p. 389)
It is the responsibility of both parents to raise their children. Allah encourages each of them to be responsible for the upbringing and nurturing of their children. Any decision they make about the child should be made with mutual understanding
Fathers are breadwinners for the family who provide food and shelter for the children and wives. Wives on the other hand play a supportive role for their husbands and also take care of the children's upbringing at home.
The Prophet (PBUH) said:
“Every one of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock. The leader of people is a guardian and is responsible for his subjects. A man is the guardian of his family and he is responsible for them. A woman is the guardian of her husband’s home and his children and she is responsible for them. The servant of a man is a guardian of the property of his master and he is responsible for it. No doubt, every one of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock.”
(Sahih-Bukhari:7138 and Muslim:1829)
The husband and wife must maintain cleanliness in terms of, clothing, hairstyles beards, etc. For women at home, Islam suggests that they apply cosmetics and adorn themselves to impress their husbands, wear their best clothes, maintain good hygiene, and apply perfume as necessary.
During a conversation with the Prophet (PBUH), a woman asked him, ‘What are the rights of a husband in relation to his wife? ’ He replied,
“Her duty is to perfume herself with the best scenting of her perfumes, and to dress in the nicest of her attires, and adorn herself with the finest of her adornments, and thus offer herself to her husband morning and night, and more than these are his rights regarding her.”
(Wasa’il ush-Shi‘ah, vol. 20, p. 158)
Additionally, a man has responsibilities toward his wife, such as keeping himself neat and clean, wearing perfume and well-cut clothes, styling his hair regularly, and making himself attractive. Check out the Riwaya Product Section to buy clothes, perfumes (fragrances), jewelry, and gifts for your spouses.
Islam promotes equality, justice, fairness, and love in all aspects of life and therefore it is not surprising the same applies to marriage. Islam has commanded both husband and wife to exercise their rights in their marriage following the Quran and Sunnah of the Prophet (PBUH).
The foundation of a successful marriage is built on mutual rights, respect, and understanding between husband and wife. A well-planned wedding can be the first step in establishing this balance. Try out our Riwaya Wedding Planner. Here you can plan according to the budget and set wedding event dates and locations and halal catering options available in nearby areas.
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